Dealing With Bad News
My medical life has been relatively stable lately. It’s been an incredible change that I’m very grateful for. That being said, I have suffered a setback. Several weeks ago, I started having pretty intense shin pain. It would come and go varying on activity level. It masked itself as knee pain or other various complications of weak hips. Now, the pain has become daily. I brought it up to my surgeon, per the advice of my physical therapist and they’ve told me that I need to rest.
That may seem like an easy answer to most people. If you’ve followed my journey for a while, you know that exercise is my answer to everything. If I’m stressed, I exercise. If I’m worried, I exercise. If I’m ecstatic, I exercise. If I’m feeling any emotion, I exercise. I love to exercise. What my physical therapist and surgeon fear is a stress fracture. It’s unlikely but given that my body is unpredictable, they feel it’s a concern that needs to be addressed.
What they’ve advised is a full stop on all activity. They even suggested crutches to remove weight from my leg altogether. Now, given that I’m in quarantine I’m not inclined to crutch around my house. I realize that going against medical advice at this point isn’t the best idea. However, the five steps from my office to bedroom doesn’t seem all that taxing.
This set back is aggravating for a multitude of reasons. At best, this pain is muscular and due to compensation from my hip. At worst, it’s a stress fracture which will require its own treatment plan. We can’t know until I stop activities for two full weeks. That brings up a lot of stress for me going without exercise. Especially because I know that every week I take off now will make my hip weaker going into surgery. It feels like a very slippery slope.
Needless to say, I’m frustrated. It’s a minor setback in the big scheme of things but everything feels big right now because of quarantine. It’s stressful as it is and without being able to let some of that energy out, I’m struggling a bit.
I hope everyone’s doing well. I hope that your day is filled with joy, positivity, and laughter. I hope you find peace, love, and happiness.
