My Experience

I'm Running a Marathon

I’m ecstatic to share that I finally got the approval to run! It has been a long journey back. It’s been eight months since I last ran and these first few times have felt absolutely amazing. As I observe my body in its various states, it’s clear I have work to do to train my heart once again. I assumed when I started running again my biggest obstacle would be my hip. Unfortunately, my heart is having to work in overdrive to keep my body upright.

My heart has never adjusted to exercise the way it’s supposed to. Even when I was at my peak of fitness, my heart would be 200-220 when I was running. On the flip side, I’ve only seen it go to 210 thus far and that’s a good starting point. Finding where to cut back and where to push through is a difficult balance. It’s one that isn’t always intuitive. For me, not knowing what is right for my body can cause a lot of anxiety. I always strive to treat my body with love and compassion but when you don’t know what it needs that can be difficult. I’m working with my physicians to understand what balance is in this situation.

My heart issues aside, my hip is holding up well. It’s struggled along my road to recovery but it seems to be hitting its stride. I can feel muscles growing. Everyday I workout I tend to feel stronger than the last. It’s so encouraging to recognize what my body is doing right. Sometimes it’s easy to get lost in how far we want to get and not realize how far we’ve actually come.

So what is the next step forward? Let’s be honest, I’ve got a long way to go. Right now, I’m only able to run/jog for a mile at a time. That will increase this week. As much as I’d like to believe my hip is fully healed, I know that it’s impractical to jump back in full throttle. I know that there are potential consequences for that negligence. That being said, my goal is and always has been, to run a marathon.

As I said, we’re not even close right now. First and foremost, I need to get my heart rate under control. I want to preface this by saying that I work with my doctors very closely and I don’t enter into training lightly. There are heart rates that are physically too high for the body to function. We are working tirelessly to ensure that my body doesn’t reach that point. Right now, I’m taking every step I can in the right direction.

My progress in all of my various health issues has never been linear. It’s one day at a time but goals are good. This is what I’m working towards right now. This is what I want, right now. If that changes in the future so be it but there’s something about running that just feels magical. Everything else floats away, it’s you (and now Crush too) and the distance. For the foreseeable future, I’m working towards a 5k. In fact, I’m working towards the virtual RACE TO BEAT POTS hosted by Dysatuonomia International. If you want to donate to my team or join my team and run/walk with me just join POTSabilities when you sign up! I’ll put the link below!

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