My Experience
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Dealing With Decision Fatigue
Lately, I’ve gotten a lot of slack for being indecisive about small things. I will be the first to admit that this is not my favorite quality about myself. I am incredibly driven and know what I want out of the next twenty years. However, when it comes to what I want for dinner, it takes me almost twenty years to decide. There’s a reason for this. It’s driven by decision fatigue. In the world of anxiety, decision fatigue is quite common. I used to struggle with this a lot during high school. The more I got my anxiety under control, the more decisive I became. Now, covid has driven…
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Why I Don't Set Goals According To My OCD
Something I learned very early on having anxiety was to not set goals based on OCD. This lesson was extremely important for me to learn. I used to make decisions based on what I believed I could do within the limits of my anxiety. I shifted my focus to believe I could do anything. Suddenly, I felt much more confident when confronting challenges that gave me anxiety. I want to say that I’m speaking out of my own experience. Anxiety is very real but this is how I’ve overcome a lot of my fears and been able to live outside of the boundaries my OCD set. Shifting your mindset is…
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A Year of Crush
This year has been a complete whirlwind. Almost exactly a year ago, I found out that I was matched with my service dog. That day was filled with so many emotions. Above all else, I was excited. That excitement came with fear and fear came with grief. Last year, my chronic illness had completely overtaken my life. I had withdrawn from my Fall semester. I had been hospitalized several times in one year, including a couple trips to the ICU. I had lost a lot of hope. Then came Crush. I felt very adamant that a service dog would be right for my life. After doing extensive research and applying…
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Help Me With My Senior Project!
I’m doing my senior project on what it means to have a disability. Please check out my google form! Submit your answers on what it means to have a disability from your perspective. There are no wrong answers. This is a great opportunity to ask questions in a safe space. CLICK HERE TO ACCESS THE GOOGLE FORM
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A Photoshoot with Crush
It was incredibly important to me to document my first year anniversary with Crush. He has completely changed my life. If you want to read more about that, check out the “Crush” or “Service Dog” tab in the cloud below. I also have an article coming out on Friday which is a year in review with Crush by my side. Anyway, I wanted to document how important he is to me. What better way to do that than getting photos taken together? I wanted to share them here with you because they make my heart absolutely soar. I hope they make you smile! I hope your day is amazing. I…
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You Deserve Professionals Who Care
I was struck this week by how important it is to trust your healthcare professionals. I see this in all aspects of my life. It has taken me a long time to find people that will work with me based on my values and vision. Not all professionals are the same. At the end of the day, everyone is human. They all come in with their own ideas and ideals. If they’re unwilling to put their ego aside and listen to you and your needs, it’s time to move on. This thought came to me while I was at physical therapy. I LOVED my physical therapist last year. I felt…
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I'm Not Broken
I’m not broken. I have a chronic illness. I do things differently. I must accommodate my disability or risk having severe consequences. That doesn’t make me broken, it makes me human.This topic has come up a few different times recently. I’ve addressed in blog articles the narrative that we set for ourselves. Today I’m talking about other’s narratives about me. I want to address this because much like my language matters, your language about me matters. I can’t change my disability. It is a part of me. When you say things like, “cause you’re broken.” It’s often very hurtful. I do a lot to manage my disability. I often try…
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A Year of Blogging
I can’t believe it but I’ve been blogging for a full year. I finally took the plunge last year after medically withdrawing from the semester. At the time, I was concerned about my neurological health. The possibility of a progressive disease was looming in the distance. It was an incredibly intense time and starting a blog felt like a way to regain control and speak my truth. I can’t thank my brother enough for helping me in this endeavor. Let’s look back at the past year. I found out that my form of dysautonomia is not progressive. That was a big win. I got my tonsils removed after a very…
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I'm Burnt Out
Like most people, I’m burnt out. It’s been one hell of a year. I think in general this year has been such a relief for me in so many ways. I know that it’s a pandemic and that’s challenging but in a lot of ways I’m doing great. For starters, I have not been hospitalized at all in 2020. I may have had several surgeries and ER visits but no weeks spent in the hospital. I call that a win. In conjunction, a lot of my surgeries have resolved quality of life issues I was facing. This has significantly increased my ability to be a normal person in their 20’s. …
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An Update on My Hip
Last week I talked about issues I was running into with my hip. I had surgery earlier this year on my left hip. I had extra bone which caused a tear in my labrum making it extremely painful to exercise. The significance of this tear was something they’d usually find in someone older, around 65-70. Now, after having amazing relief in my left hip, my right hip is causing me problems. I saw my orthopedic surgeon and they came up with a treatment plan. After looking at images of my hip, it’s clear there are abnormalities. Not only do I have extra bone on my femur and hip socket, my…
